Regaining Control of Your Time: Strategies for Dealing with Individuals Who Interrupt You.
Desiring to contribute meaningfully to your surroundings is a common aspiration. Feeling valued often comes from being heard, which is a fundamental need for most people. However, the reality is that not everyone gets the opportunity to express themselves equally, often due to individuals who constantly interrupt, talk over them, or fail to provide space for their voice. You’re likely familiar with these individuals, and if you find yourself in a situation where someone habitually speaks over you, you might occasionally wish you could find a way to ensure they pause and let others speak.
Navigating individuals who habitually interrupt and talk over others is a universal experience, though it affects some more than others. A study featured in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology revealed that the contributions of Black women in group conversations are often misremembered and attributed incorrectly, more so than those of Black men, white men, and white women. So, when faced with a persistent interrupter, how can you effectively ensure your voice is heard amidst these (rather aggravating) individuals? We have some strategies to help you achieve that.
Stay One Step Ahead of Interruptions.
When initiating a conversation with the habitual interrupter, you can proactively address the matter with a straightforward statement. Consider saying something along the lines of, “Before we begin, I’d like to request that I be allowed to express myself without interruptions. Interruptions tend to derail my train of thought, so I’d appreciate it if we could hold off on comments or questions until I’ve finished.” Many interrupters are not accustomed to having such communication boundaries set for them. This approach makes them acutely aware of their tendency to interrupt and labels it as a potential issue.
Consider Using a Brief “I Hadn’t Completed Yet”.
If you find yourself interrupted, consider a straightforward response by interrupting back and stating, “I hadn’t finished.” This approach is a direct and concise way to address the situation without necessarily accusing the interrupter. It simply highlights the fact that you were in the midst of speaking when the interruption occurred and asserts your right to continue. Moreover, it underscores the importance of the interrupter being more mindful of when someone has naturally concluded their point.
Don’t Expect an Opportunity (It Won’t Arrive).
When dealing with individuals who tend to speak continuously without pause, you may never find a natural break in their monologue. If you’re waiting for an opportunity to interject, it simply won’t present itself. In such cases, you may need to adapt by interrupting them, but it’s essential to do so in a tactful manner. When you sense they are wrapping up a particular thought, take advantage of that moment to jump in. Allowing them to complete their current sentence will likely lead them into the next one, so it’s crucial to identify that optimal instant to interject before they transition into a new idea.
Continue Speaking Despite the Interruption.
You need not halt your speech when someone interrupts you. Since they aren’t respecting your ongoing conversation, there’s no obligation for you to honor their interruption. As you persist with your point, consider slightly raising your voice to redirect the attention towards your message. Employing this strategy can effectively convey to the interrupter that their interruptions don’t automatically grant them the spotlight.
Take a Moment, Then Express “As I Was Mentioning”.
This technique can prove quite effective when dealing with a particularly assertive interrupter. Cease speaking temporarily and allow them to voice their thoughts. However, refrain from acknowledging or responding to what they’ve just said. Instead, allow an uncomfortable pause to linger, and then assert, “As I was mentioning.” This action draws everyone’s attention, including the interrupter’s, to the fact that they interrupted you. Furthermore, it reframes their interruption in a new context, highlighting the fact that they cut you off.
Leverage Nonverbal Signals and Physical Gestures.
Occasionally, verbal communication may prove ineffective with a particularly loud and assertive interrupter. In such instances, resorting to nonverbal cues becomes essential. Employ the “stop” gesture by raising your hand to signal that it’s not their turn to speak. Alternatively, place your hand on the bridge of your nose and look downward, conveying your frustration and disappointment, which could potentially lead them to pause and inquire about the issue. Depending on the nature of your relationship, you might even consider simply walking away. If they ask why, you can assert, “I prefer not to engage with individuals who consistently interrupt me.”
Discuss the Interruption Matter in a Private Setting.
Should the problem persist, consider having a private conversation with the individual, addressing this specific issue. They may not be conscious of their interrupting behavior, and if they are willing to rectify it, the process might take some time. You can establish a discreet signal to use when they interrupt you (or others), serving as a gentle reminder of their habit. Taking the initiative to discuss this matter privately with them may be more appreciated than addressing it in a public setting.
